Tribute to my Dad

On July 1, 2009, my dad left his earthly home and entered into his eternal home. On July 6, 2009, I gave this tribute as part of my dad's service.

About a week and a half ago, a friend asked me what was the best gift my dad ever gave me, and I asked do you mean like something I could hold in my hand, something tangible? And she said yes. The first thought that popped into my head was a toboggan dad and mom gave my brothers and me one Christmas. We tripped over it all night checking the time in anticipation of Christmas morning and what delight when we saw it. We would haul that toboggan back by the river or to the hill by the campfire girl house, load it with about 4 or 5 kids and fly down the hill, as I recall after all these years, at about the speed of light.

That toboggan brought us a lot of fun, but the very, very best gift my dad gave me isn’t something I can hold in my hand. Psalm 145 verse 4 says “Parents will tell their children what you have done. They will retell your mighty acts.” Growing up with my dad, I learned what it means to live life well. My dad showed me how to be a servant. He taught me how it looks to serve your family and friends. He showed me how you honor your parents, siblings, in-laws, spouse and children. I saw a man who was truly the spiritual head of the household. He also taught me the importance of serving the people God puts in our lives. And while we don’t always want to serve; it is through that service I learned about obedience.

Dad taught me about relationships. When Grandma Van Wyk was still with us, he loved to stop by her house on a Saturday morning and just sit and visit. In more recent years, he has done the same with Nicki. A piece of cake and a cup of coffee make the visit even sweeter. I recall visiting my Grandma and Grandpa Brasser on Sunday afternoons. Dad and Grandpa would stand and talk as they pushed us on the swing.

He was so honored and humbled when Mike Buehler asked if they could meet together. He didn’t think he had much to offer; I think we know he did. I could try to name the people he enjoyed spending time with, but I run the risk of omitting someone. You know who you are and spending time with you, going out to eat, playing games or just visiting were things that gave him joy.

My kids always told me whenever they went anywhere with Grandma and Grandpa, they always came across someone they knew and had to stop and talk for a while. Whenever mom and dad went to an event, they were always the last ones to leave, still visiting, as the lights were turned out and the person in charge waited for them before locking the door.
He took such pride in the courage of his parents leaving their home in Holland and beginning a new life in the United States, learning a new language and bringing up their family in a whole new world. He loved my mom and their 55-year marriage is a testament to love, perseverance and honor.

He taught me about faith. Today my heart is so heavy and sometimes a wave of sadness washes over me and I have to stop and say “Breathe, Linda, just breathe.” But under and through that sadness is a fountain, it’s a fountain that bubbles cool, refreshing, living water. I can feel the peace that passes all understanding. This fountain gives me joy despite my sadness and reassures me that my dad is in a place that is more real than anything we think is real. I believe it is more real than the feel of the church bench on your back, more real than the feel of the ground under your feet. I believe what my dad sees is more beautiful, more brilliant than anything we can imagine.

The first weekend my dad became sick, I got up Saturday morning and in my dad’s garden were the most beautiful, brilliant orange lilies in front of absolutely stunning purple irises. When compared to the colors my dad is seeing now, I believe these flowers would look pale and anemic. My dad loved nature, the world God has created. I believe that while God created a stunningly beautiful earth, it pales in comparison to the beauty of heaven.

My dad loved music. It was a joy for him to sing with the Pine Haven Chorus, he loved listening to Barb play the piano, going to musicals and musical programs. I believe the music my dad hears now from the heavenly choir is of such clarity and perfect pitch that we cannot even imagine.

Rev. 7 verse 16 tells us we will never be hungry again, and will never be thirsty again, yet in Matthew 8:11 we learn that "Many people will come from the east and from the west and will sit and eat with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob in the kingdom of heaven." And in Luke 22:29-30 it is written that "Just as my Father has given me a kingdom, I also give you a kingdom so you may eat and drink at my table in my kingdom. I’ve had some pretty good meals over the years, but I believe in heaven there is a banquet the likes of which we have not tasted.

2 Peter 1 verse 11 says "And you will be given a very great welcome into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ." I believe as my dad reached heaven’s gates he was welcomed by his parents, my mom’s parents, Uncle Calvin, Aunt Edie and a host of others who have passed on before him. I believe my dad saw something we were not able to see on earth – the sight of Zachary running to greet him with open arms and laughter bubbling from his lips. I believe someone, perhaps one of my grandmothers, placed Ryan in my dad’s arms, a strong, happy, healthy baby who knows that his grandpa has joined him.

But best of all, I believe my dad is in the very presence of the God he has served so faithfully and God says to him "you have fought a good fight, you have finished the race, and you have remained faithful. And now the prize awaits you – the crown of righteousness."

Living life well means accepting the challenges God gives you, trusting Him to help you perform them as well as possible and when you can no longer carry them, you look behind you and there are people there who say “Pass them here, I will take them from you now.” I see in our family a willingness, yes even the desire, to take those tasks from dad and carry them forward. When it was time to take dad out of the hospital, my mom made the decision to care for him at home. I saw her love for him as day by day he slipped away from us. I see Jeff helping Nicki keep her lawnmower in shape. Jeff, Garrett, Noah and Dale taking care of dad’s yard. Cody and Elizabeth driving 10 hours to be at the hospital for less than a day to help interpret “doctor talk” and spend time with my dad massaging and soothing him. The day we brought my dad back to his house, I mentioned to the rest of the family that the flower beds were a bit weedy. The thistles out there were particularly irritating to me. Shortly afterwards, I look out and see Carson out in the flower bed with the thistle sticker, pretty soon Shari joins him, then Mark, Dale, Carissa, even Noah and Brianna are all out there cleaning up the flower bed. Shari brings our meal one night and Nancy brings a meal another night. Then right after we’re finished eating there goes Jeff to clean up the sump pump. I don’t even want to know what’s involved with cleaning up a sump pump. When I came back to Iowa last Tuesday, Carissa gave me the gift of her time so there was someone in the car with me. Katie and Garrett took time out of their day to watch Brianna as a munchkin in the Sheboygan Falls Elementary School production of “The Wizard of Oz.” Yes, dad has taught all of us about service, relationships and faith.

What an honor, what a privilege that God chose this man to be my dad. And now I have to wonder ... how does a girl live without her dad? I’m not sure, I’ve never had to do this before. My heart spills over with gratitude of how my dad was an example of living life well. And now…. dad can look behind him and see hands ready to take from him the work he has been so faithful to perform. Praise God for the life of my dad. Praise God.